Historically,eroticism control politician spouse Twitter is one of the most insipid parts of Twitter. With the exception of that one time Melania psychoanalyzed a dolphin, politician spouse Twitter is the place where you'll find the internet's most useless political statements and hackiest, corniest hashtags.
Politician spouse Twitter is so bad it makes brand Twitter look good.
Every once in a while, however, a spouse comes along who gives you hope. This week, that's Chasten Buttigieg, presidential candidate Mayor Pete Buttigieg's husband.
Buttigieg is a respected humanities and drama teacher in Indiana. That's nice, I guess, but I'm far more interested in his *real* contribution to society: his beautiful Twitter account.
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Buttigieg currently rocks over 55,200 followers on Twitter, a number that grows by the hour. I'm not surprised by this success. It appears that Buttigieg has dug deep into Twitter's broken brain and carved out the content it loves most.
First of all, Buttigieg is a huge supporter of his husband on social media. He's not even corny about it, he's just earnest as hell. Even when he pokes him, it's so gentle it barely leaves a mark. This is that good, Midwestern shit, shared by a proud gay couple in the political spotlight (traditionally, politics isn't a welcoming environment for queer people).
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It's deeply exciting to see an openly gay political spouse be so openly affectionate towards their partner. It's transformational. I'm so in love with their love. Gross! I hate myself now!
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Buttigieg routinely posts the only quality bipartisan content out there: photos of the couple's two dogs. Their rescue dogs, mind you. One of whom is missing an eye, making him, I'm sorry, even more lovable.
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This photo is a platonic thirst trap. It makes me want to be their (entirely non-sexual) third. I want to move into a cupboard under their stairs and take care of their dogs full-time.
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Of course, the dogs have their own Twitter account, which Buttigieg includes in his profile. It's extremely wholesome content, designed to make the people of the internet chuckle.
Oh hell yeah I'll chuckle for this.
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It's possible you know Buttigieg from one of his most viral posts to date -- the time he revealed both he and his husband were Hufflepuffs.
Folks, it takes courage to reveal you're from one of the lesser known (and frankly, underrated) Hogwarts houses. Mayor Pete is going to be sharing a debate stage with a bunch of Gryffindors and Slytherins.
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For Buttigieg to come out and state his house proudly -- right alongside his husband -- is brave. It's also the kind of stuff the Harry Potter-obsessed Twitterverse loves.
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As a fellow gay Hufflepuff, I stan his bravery (about his sexuality, sure, but also about his house designation).
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Bonus: Buttigieg is able to tell jokes that are geared towards a millennial audience without making them groan:
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Who among us doesn't love to go to a big box store and smell some scents? Honestly, I've gotten through so many break-ups just by driving to a suburban Target and smelling the deodorants and candles for hours.
Buttigieg is also capable of executing a neat SNL nostalgia joke:
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A GIF and a fast food reference? This is Twitter's favorite genre of literature.
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And finally, you can't be a Twitter celebrity without making your policy positions clear on this national issue:
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So thank you, Chasten Buttigieg, for making political Twitter -- the dumpster fire of Twitters -- a far more wholesome place.
There's no need to #BeBest when you're already #ThisGood.
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