【Mission XXX Impossible】

Source：Unobstructed Information Network Editor：Entertainment Time：2025-06-26 15:14:26

In Puerto Rico right now,Mission XXX Impossible 60 percent of people don't have access to potable water. It's only natural that the President has decided to allocate all of his resources to the cause that needs it the most: the Dallas Cowboys.

Trump's attention span is notoriously limited -- this is, reportedly, a man who won't read national security briefings unless his name is included multiple times -- and Puerto Rico's humanitarian crisis is growing by the day. 80 percent of their crops are estimated to have been ruined. Power may not come back for six months or more. An aid package isn't expected to arrive until mid-October, far too late for folks with struggling with depleted oxygen tanks and unrefrigerated insulin.

It's time for Trump's parents, aka Daddy Kelly, to put away his toys and ask him to be a good boy now.

SEE ALSO: Hurricane Maria plunged Puerto Rico into a humanitarian crisis, and help has barely arrived

Last night, the President blamed the island's current crisis on its debt -- not, you know, a hurricane -- and later claimed that "food and water" were doing well, whatever that means.

Here's how we can get him to focus on an island that desperately needs his help.

1. Throw a huge military parade with army tanks in the middle of the island. Let him toot one!

Credit: antoine gyori/Corbis via Getty Images

Big boy Trump loves nothing more than seeing big scary tanks and trucks go honk-honk!

2. Draw his electoral college victory map in the sand.

Spotted: A map to be hung somewhere in the West Wing pic.twitter.com/TpPPDyNFtE
— Trey Yingst (@TreyYingst) May 11, 2017

3. Lie and tell him that Obama refused to go.

"Ner ner ner ner ner ner ner" - President Trump Credit: chip somodevilla/Getty Images

4. Let him hold a campaign rally there.

Via Giphy

This election won't end until we're all dead.

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